The call for a celebration of males in modern times is as needed as much as a public holiday for white skinned people in the US. Most political offices in the world are held by men, the gender pay gap still favours human beings that lack mammary glands and even forward thinking science communities are still plagued with sexism. But if we were to, say hypothetically, champion what it is like to be male in a sea of feminism and push forth the agenda that being a man is something to be proud of, how would that be achieved?
Men are can be childish. As one myself I can substantiate the claim that despite the ageing process, intention of being a good father and consideration for the future, I still have a grasp on my youth and occasionally find yours truly heralding the idiot inside. This isn’t meant as a criticism of men, merely a nod to other likeminded chaps that embracing one’s youth isn’t [always] a reason to be ashamed.
I am no expert on the ‘isms’ that we surround ourselves with but tend to side with the good natured, equal rights society that social media often stands for. The mere mentioning of how one type of person is different from another is unsteady ground for me, but I will put my childish brain in gear and attempt a few key points. Males:
- spend more time thinking about sex
- mature later in life
- are naughtier
- often fail in attempts at wooing females
Myth, legend and even the movies tell us that male warriors in skirts would flash their genitals at enemies before charging in to battle. Scores of men, unable to communicate verbally with their child-like minds would send a message that says “look at my penis, look at my balls, now I am going to fight you.” Fortunately the day of revealing oneself in anger has past, this replaced with getting naked on top of mountains. While men and women are both guilty as charged, it can be argued that being caught up in the moment / peer pressure is to blame.
Casually lowering a pair of pubic-laden testicles in front of a camera lens to add compositional elements to a beautiful scene is evidence of the suppressed male scream of masculinity. The burden a professional man, white collared, supposedly intelligent and objective is released upon the advance of his nut sack.
The Joe Cornish Boulders have been replaced by the Nutscape.
Since early 2014 a Tumblr page set up by American artist Clancy Philbrick has been publishing submitted images of bollock spoiled landscapes that it calls Nutscapes. There’s no shortage of male participants either and while posts from February 2014 appear to feature the same dimply loose skin in every scene, further imagery shows a wider range of different sperm generating organs.
conker conquer the meme will be telling.
With permission from the founders of Nutscapes here are the remaining images that have so far found their way into Internet history.
If you’ve got a spare set of dangle berries you’d like to unleash upon nature, then Nutscapes has a great How-to guide and submission page for prospective part time nudists.
As always, your thoughts in the comment section or via our social media pages are welcomed.
All images used with explicit permission from Nutscapes.
Lmao this entire article reeks of fishmouth.
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